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PHONE SEX HUMOR!

SO THE OTHER NIGHT THERE WAS THIS GUY THAT CALLED ME AND HE HAD ASKED ME CAN HE HEAR MY HUSBAND JOE FUCK ME. I TOLD HIM YES HE CAN, BY THE WAY THAT WOULD REALLY TURN THE BOTH OF US ON AND I REALLY WANTED TO GET THIS GUY TO CUM. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN LISTENING TO HIM MOAN ON THE OTHER END OF THE PHONE..LOL. AS SOON AS JOE ENTERED HIS THICK COCK INTO MY PUSSY I STARTED TREMBLING ALL OVER THE PLACE, BY THE WAY HE ALWAYS GIVE ME A GREAT THRILL. I AM  ALWAYS LOOKING FORWARD TO HIS COCK ENTERING ALL THREE HOLES. OPPS I FORGOT.. I NEED TO GET BACK TO THE GUY I HAD ON THEPHONE..LOL HE REALLY CAME QUICK. I WAS ONLY INTO THE SEX FOR 2 MINS AND THE GUY EXPLODES WITH CUM. I JUST THOUGHT THAT WAS REALLY FUNNY BECAUSE I’M USED TO MEN THAT TAKE A WHILE TO CUM..WHICH I LIKE BECAUSE THE SEX LAST LONGER THAT WAY, WHAT CAN I SAY I LIKE A LITTLE FOREPLAY!


SHELLY

http://1swingerphonesex.com/shelly.html


1-888-251-1537

shel1

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Model Homes

joblo
I remember one time my photographer boyfriend was going to cover the grand opening of a new housing complex. There were five different designs, and he had to take interior pictures in the model units of all five designs. Since these were the models, he had to wait until after their office closed to make sure they were empty. He chose a night that would allow him most the night to shoot, and he listed me as his assistant so that I could accompany him.
The night of the shoot I was prepared - my bra & panties set, white stockings, black pumps, a pleated plaid skirt, and a white blouse to give me a schoolgirl look. The first house went down without a hitch and we started out way ahead of schedule. House #2 we decided to add a little flavor, and on top of the shots for the housing company, he did a set of shots for me. The third house we got a little more creative, and in the shots for me, I slowly stripped down to just my stockings and pumps. For an extra thrill, I ran from the third house to the fourth in just my stockings & heels, leaving my clothes behind.
After an extra long photo shoot (plus some other …. activities), we came out of the fourth house intending to go to the final one, only to find a half-dozen construction workers standing around grinning. As I tried covering up quickly, they started clapping and whistling. I sprinted back to the third house and got dressed as fast as I could. The clothes just didn’t seem to cover enough as I could feel their eyes all over me the whole way through the final shoot.

Joanna at
1-888-463-1258

http://1swingerphonesex.com/joanna.html

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Harley

Tessendorf's Sexy Nude WomenI remember my senior year in high school, a party that this one girl threw … sure, I really disliked her, but - HEY! - it was a party.
During the party, she sidled up to me and told me her ex-boyfriend was going to stop in some time that night. The party wore on, and I got a few drinks in me, so when I saw this nice Harley motorcycle pull up, I got interested. When I heard this was her ex, a plan instantly formed in my head, and the plan went into action as soon as his helmet came off to reveal a hot Val Kilmer look-alike.
I went over to the Harley & asked “so, were you going to give me a ride?”. “Sure” he responded “hop on.”
We left the party right then and never went back. Riding free, holding on to this hunk, with the vibrations of the bike throbbing between my legs, I was getting very worked up. He pulled over on the side of the road on a stretch of road that ran alongside a beach.
As soon as he climbed off the motorcycle, I jumped on him and started kissing all over him. We dropped to the ground and fucked like crazy right there beside the harley.

AMY 1-888-277-6536
http://1swingerphonesex.com/amy.html

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Julie’s Swingers’ Club: Ben

julbloI felt like something different this week, so I chose a young hunk at the swingers’ club this time. We decided on a home burglary theme. Since it was my week to have the house, it worked out fine.
I spent all morning waiting on him to start his “robbery”. Since I had so much time to think about it, I decided that I was going to turn the tables on this guy. Finally, shortly before noon, I heard a sound near the pre-arranged window and I hid close by with our gun (yes, I had made sure there were no bullets in it). Once he had gotten all the way through the window, I stepped out of hiding, pointed the gun at him, and demanded he undress. After he was totally naked except his hood, I instructed him to move to the bedroom where my toys were. I had him cuff his ankles into my leg-spreaders, and cuff his wrists with my pink, fluffy handcuffs. Now that he was at my mercy, I could use him any way I wanted. I put away the gun and brought out my flogger. I told him that I didn’t want to hear a word from him as long as I kept him.
I started out by making him pluck grapes & put them in a bowl, then feed me the grapes one at a time as I reached out and started stroking his cock. Once the grapes were gone, I sat up and started sucking his dick. I made him stand there while I gave him a blow-job to rock his world. When he started cumming, I backed off enough to let his load shoot on my face & tits. I ordered him to lick me clean while I undressed down to my stockings and high-heels. Once he ws finished licking up his own cum, I said “don’t stop!” and had him continue licking until he was done licking all my important spots. I then allowed him to fill my grape bowl with water, and let him lap up a drink from the bowl.
I led him back to the bathroom whose window he had crawled in through, tossed the cuff key on the floor and told him to let himself out the same way he got in.
Sure, this week was shorter than usual, but the thrill was worth it.

Julie at 1-888-243-3614
http://1swingerphonesex.com/julie.html

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Phone Sex

joblo1I love phone sex … I think I’m addicted to it. It started out because my boyfrioend at the time was never home, always out somewhere around the world on a photo shoot. He’s a well-known photographer, and was always being called away on shoots for different magazines (usually under fake names so that his main employer didn’t know).
Anyway, once settled in on location, he would call me and describe his surroundings, and we’d go from there. Sometimes I was a geisha girl, or Harem slave, or cheerleader, or once even a Swiss lass.
Now that we went our seperate ways, he still calls me from time to time for the phone sex, but I found I like phone sex so much that his calls aren’t enough. I find myself lounging around the house waiting for the phone to ring, looking foreward to whatever fantasy I can fly into next. Give me a call, give me a fantasy. My phone number is 1-888-463-1258 . If you wish, you could go to my free webpage at http://1swingerphonesex.com/joanna.html to check out the xxx pics. There’s no ‘club’ to join and it’s spam-free.

Joanna at 1-888-463-1258

http://1swingerphonesex.com/joanna.html

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Beer Run

rebloDon’t you hate it when you go in to buy a case of beer , and you’re just a couple of dollars short? Well, that happened to me not too long ago, and I really hated it. I was trying to talk the clerk into letting me slide just this once saying all sorts of stuff, and I guess at one point I said something like “what, you want me to come over there and give you a blowjob?” because his face suddenly lit up and he said “yep, that would do it”. Well, I quipped back that the blowjob would go alot better if I could wet my whistle with one of those beers. He broke open the case himself and popped the top off the first can he grabbed. I crawled behind the counter, sucked down half the beer while he was fishing his little pecker out of his pants. I started sucking him like there was no tomorrow, swishing the beer around his cock. While working his joystick, I heard another customer come up, and made sure I flicked my tongue an extra lot while he was trying to read out their total. He finally came in a shuddering spasm. I washed my mouth out with the rest of the beer, stood up grinning, grabbed my beer and left.

Rebecca 1-888-328-3469
http://1swingerphonesex.com/rebecca/html

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Walking the Dog

joblog
The other day I was walking the dog in a nearby parkwhen I noticed that my little toy poodle was acting like he was on the trail of something. I let him take the lead, and soon we were following a jack russel terrier and a doberman pup … both being walked by a young blonde woman in running shorts and a tee-shirt.
When we caught up with them I took the opportunity to open conversation, and we got along great … the dogs all seemed to enjoy each others’ company as well. Once it was time to head home, we said our good-bye’s and headed out of the park, only to find out that we lived in the same housing community. We laughed about it, and said our good-byes again when I reached my door … she lived a few houses further down.
That evening, I got a knock on my door, and there she was … the blonde from the park, with a dark-haired gentleman in tow. “This is the one I told you about, Jim” she said, and introductions were made all ’round. It seemed that Jim and Kayla were recently married, and enjoyed an “open lifestyle”, while I enjoyed Jim and Kayla. Things progressed from there, and next thing I knew Jim was licking on my breasts as he undid my blouse while I could feel Kayla’s fingernails and hot breath while she pulled down my slacks and panties. I started kissing and fondling her breasts while watching Jim undress in the corner of my eye. He had a tight, firm body, tanned skin, thick black hair on his head with a 5-o’clock shadow, but little hair elsewhere. His dick didn’t look very impressive, but the rest of him made my mouth water.
He came over and started fondling me from behind while Kayla broke away. She stood in front of me to undress while Jim was nibbling on my neck and running his hands all over me from behind. She had no bra under her tee-shirt (which I had already discovered a few minutes ago) and her boobs were nice and firm. She had long legs that were emphasized by the shorts, and seemed to go forever while she bent over pulling them off to reveal her panties … a white lacy thong. As her thong fell to the floor I gasped seeing her nicely trimmed bikini-cut blonde bush. She came back to join the two of us on the bed, and we were all over each other after that.
Looks like this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

Joanna,   at   1-888-463-1258

http://1swingerphonesex.com/joanna.html

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Julie’s Swing Club: Arthur

julblog

Thursday night at the swingers’ club was nice. A little chat here and there, some nice finger foods. I met up with “Arthur” … clean-cut, conservative brown hair, medium build … the last kind of guy you’d expect to be at a swingers’ club.
We registered out, and disappeared from the party setting early. He treated me out to a very nice restaurant dinner and we headed to an upscale hotel he was registered in. Once in his room we did some heavy petting and some groping while deciding how to spend the next day. After determining our agenda, we had some great sex … nothing kinky, but his schlong was definitely NOT medium at a full ten inches.
The next day, as planned, I went shopping for a salad in a nearby grocery store wearing nothing under my front-snap dress when he approached me like a stranger, only to reach foreward & unsnap a couple snaps. I ignored him at first as though I hadn’t noticed, and he unsnapped a few more snaps. Turning toward him, I allowed his hand inside my dress. While embracing, I felt his hand unsnapping the rest of my snaps, so that the dress was fully open. I pressed against him so as to not be exposed to anyone else. His massive cock fell out from his pants and started pressing against me.
His hands rubbing all over my naked skin, his fat dick sliding between my thighs, almost naked right there in the grocery store … I climaxed standing up.
Leaving the store, I held on close behind him - part of the thrill of the day was that anything he undid I couldn’t re-do until getting back to the hotel room. Call me if you want to hear other adventures we did.

Julie at
1-888-243-3614

http://1swingerphonesex.com/julie.html

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Oh What a Night

rebblog

I was so bored last Saturday night, I figured I’d stop into a nearby sports bar and grab a bite to eat. Well, buffalo wings are alot better with beer, so I had a beer to wash them down with.
Next thing I know, I had a strong urge to go pee. I headed to the ladies’ room only to find this place had only one unisex bathroom, and it was closed. I settled up, and headed out to the parking lot … but my blader refused to be ignored. I figured that under cover of darkness, I could get away with ducking behind my car, soooo.. after a glance around, I took a quick squat.
I closed my eyes as wave after wave of golden liquid relief escaped. My eyes flew open, though, when I felt a rush of hot liquid hitting my face. There in front of me was one of the patrons I remembered from the bar, definitely drunk, peeing right on top of me … my hair, my face, my blouse … all covered in his golden stream. I had found a place so dark that he had chosen to use it as well.
For some reson this turned me on, and as his last drops came out, I made my move … I came foreward enough to start licking on his exposed cock. After his initial shock of the situation, he decided this was a good thing and stood in place enjoying the blow job. There I was … covered in pee, sucking off a stranger in a parking lot. What a turn-on.
When he was done, I hopped in my car and headed home. No words were ever exchanged, and he never even got a good look at my face.

Rebecca 1-888-328-3469
http://1swingerphonesex.com/rebecca.html

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Belly Dancing Lessons

joannablog
I’ve had this thing for the longest time: I wanted to be a belly dancer. I imagined myself tucked away in some harem wearing nothing but a tiny loincloth, dancing for important people, my body on display as I seduce them with my sultry moves.
I finally got up the nerve to sign up for belly dancing lessons, but when I showed up at the studio, the instructor said he didn’t think I had what it takes. He took me into a back room where another guy was waiting and told me to strip down to my panties and dance. Well, it didn’t take long before I was getting fucked by one of them from behind while sucking on the other one’s massive cock.
No, I didn’t have what it took to be a belly dancer, but I found other ways my sultry moves could seduce.

Joanna 1-888-463-1258

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